There Is No Such Thing as “Your Truth”
- The Wholy Christian
- Jan 31
- 10 min read
Perspective can explain what you notice. It can’t rewrite what’s real.
There’s a sentence that sounds like wisdom in the modern world. It shows up in memes, captions, arguments, podcasts, classrooms, and even church conversations if we’re not paying attention.
“Everyone has their own truth.”
It sounds mature. It sounds tolerant. It sounds like we’re finally being kind to people’s experiences. But if you slow down and ask what it actually means, it doesn’t hold together. Not logically. Not practically. And definitely not biblically.
Because here’s the reality: perspective is real. Experience is real. Pain is real. And yes, people can describe the same moment differently.
But truth isn’t created by our angle of view.
Truth is what’s real, whether we like it or not, whether we understand it or not, whether we agree with it or not.
And the moment we treat truth as personal property, we don’t become compassionate. We become confused. And confusion doesn’t stay small. It spreads. It bleeds into morality, identity, relationships, accountability, repentance, and the way we talk about God Himself.
So let’s talk about it. Not in a stiff, lecture tone. Just real. Clear. Thorough. Because if we’re going to follow Jesus Christ, we can’t afford to be foggy about truth.
Perspective Is a Lens, Not a Creator
Those two memes you mentioned are perfect examples of how this ideology sneaks in.
The cylinder casts different shadows. One person sees a square, another sees a circle, and the caption says both are true.
The six and nine argument says the same thing: “Both people are right from their perspective.”
But those examples don’t prove that truth changes. They prove that people can be limited.
Let’s stay with the cylinder for a second. If the object is a cylinder, then the “square” shadow isn’t the object. The “circle” shadow isn’t the object. Those shadows are partial evidence. They’re what the object looks like from one angle under one light source on one wall.
The truth isn’t the shadow. The truth is the object.
Now take the six and nine. People love acting like that meme is deep, but it only works if you pretend the creator doesn’t exist. If someone painted a six on the ground, then it’s a six. If someone painted a nine, then it’s a nine. Perspective can create confusion, but it can’t create reality. And the moment you add context, the argument dies. Put an underline under the number. Put it in a sequence. Ask the person who wrote it. You’ll find out fast what it is.
So here’s the real lesson:
A limited perspective can explain why someone thinks something is true. It doesn’t make it true.
That’s an important difference, because modern culture keeps trying to blur that line until it disappears.
What People Mean When They Say “My Truth” (And Where It Goes Wrong)
Sometimes when people say “my truth,” they mean something innocent.
They mean:
“This is what I went through.”
“This is how it hit me.”
“This is what I remember.”
“This is what I believe right now.”
That’s fine. Those are statements about experience. Nobody’s arguing with that.
The problem is that “my truth” rarely stays in the “experience” lane. It usually slides into a different lane without anyone noticing.
And that lane sounds like this:
“You can’t challenge what I’m saying, because it’s my truth.”
At that point, “my truth” stops being a description and starts being a shield. It becomes a way to end discussion, avoid correction, or keep a preferred interpretation untouched.
And once that happens, we’re not talking about compassion anymore. We’re talking about authority.
Because whoever gets to define truth gets to define everything else downstream.
How This Plays Out in Real Life
Let’s get really practical here, because this is where people finally feel it.
This isn’t just “out there” on the internet. This is how arguments happen in kitchens, trucks, living rooms, group chats, and workplace meetings.
1) Relationship Arguments That Never Heal
You’ve seen this. Maybe you’ve lived this.
Someone says, “When you said that, it felt disrespectful.”
The other says, “That’s not what I meant.”
And then it escalates into: “Well, that’s my truth.”
Now the conversation is stuck.
Because instead of searching for reality together, both people retreat into separate worlds.
But a relationship can’t run on two different realities forever. If it does, you don’t get intimacy. You get distance. You don’t get repair. You get resentment.
Here’s what’s actually needed in moments like that:
“What did you mean?”
“What did you hear?”
“What did I say exactly?”
“Was that reasonable to take that way?”
“What’s the pattern here?”
“What do we need to change?”
That’s how couples grow. Not by treating every interpretation as equally true, but by letting truth pull them toward clarity, humility, and repentance.
And yes, feelings matter. They matter a lot. But feelings are not the judge. They are the signal that something needs attention.
2) “That’s Not What Happened” vs “That’s How I Felt”
Here’s a common situation.
A friend says, “You ignored me at that party.”
You say, “I didn’t ignore you. I was dealing with something and I barely talked to anyone.”
They respond, “That’s my truth.”
Now look at what just happened.
Their feeling got promoted into a claim about reality.
It’s true they felt ignored. That’s real. That matters. But it may not be true that you ignored them.
This is why language matters.
“I felt ignored” is a feeling statement.
“You ignored me” is an accusation.
When “my truth” becomes the bridge between those two statements, it turns emotions into verdicts. And when emotions become verdicts, relationships start breaking under false charges.
A mature conversation keeps both things in the right place:
“I believe you when you say you felt ignored.”
“And I also need you to hear me when I say I didn’t ignore you.”
That’s not invalidation. That’s clarity.
3) Workplace Accountability That Gets Derailed
You’ve probably seen this at work because it’s becoming normal.
A manager says, “You missed the deadline.”
The employee says, “My truth is that I wasn’t supported.”
Sometimes they weren’t supported. Sometimes the workload was unreasonable. Sometimes leadership failed. All of that should be addressed.
But notice what can happen if the phrase “my truth” becomes the final word.
A fact gets treated like a perspective.
A measurable outcome gets treated like an opinion.
Responsibility gets dissolved into narrative.
But deadlines aren’t narratives. Either the job got done or it didn’t. Either the concrete cured or it didn’t. Either the inspection passed or it didn’t. Reality doesn’t care about our internal story.
Healthy teams can hold both things at once:
“The deadline was missed.”
“And we need to talk about what contributed so we can fix it.”
“My truth” language often skips the first part and jumps straight to self-protection.
4) Therapy Language That Turns Feelings Into Authority
This is one of the sneakiest changes in modern conversation.
People say, “I feel unsafe,” when what they mean is:
“I feel uncomfortable.”
“I feel challenged.”
“I feel criticized.”
“I don’t like where this conversation is going.”
That discomfort might be real. It might even be a warning sign. But “unsafe” is a claim about reality, not just emotion.
When we treat feelings as truth, whoever feels the most strongly becomes the authority in the room. And that doesn’t create peace. It creates a power dynamic.
The mature approach keeps both things true:
“I’m hearing that you’re feeling overwhelmed or threatened.”
“And we also need to clarify what’s actually happening.”
Feelings are real. They’re just not always accurate. That’s not an insult. That’s human.
5) “Living My Truth” as a Moral Pass
This is where things get serious fast.
People say “I’m living my truth” as a way to justify choices they already want.
“I know it’s not biblical, but it’s my truth.”
“I know this is hurting people, but I’m finally being true to myself.”
“I’m choosing what feels right.”
That sounds like freedom.
But if truth is whatever feels right, then sin just becomes self-expression. Repentance becomes self-betrayal. Obedience becomes oppression.
And that is exactly why this mindset is dangerous.
Because it doesn’t just affect opinions. It affects souls.
6) Redefining Words Until Nothing Means Anything
Another place this shows up is with definitions.
People redefine words and then build entire moral arguments on their new definition.
Love becomes “never challenging.”
Freedom becomes “no restraint.”
Judgment becomes “disagreement.”
Truth becomes “authenticity.”
But if words can mean anything, they eventually mean nothing. And when words lose meaning, society loses the ability to reason together. Everything becomes emotional, tribal, and power-based.
And that’s what we’re watching happen.
What’s Really Being Claimed Underneath It All
Now let’s pull the curtain back.
When someone says “truth is relative,” or “everyone has their truth,” it sounds humble. But it actually makes a massive claim.
It claims that there is no authority above the self.
Because if truth comes from inside me, then I am the final reference point. I decide what’s right. I decide what’s real. I decide what matters. Correction becomes an attack. Disagreement becomes harm. God becomes optional.
And here’s the wild part.
People don’t live like relativism is true.
They only use it when it benefits them.
If someone lies about you, you don’t say, “That’s their truth.”
If someone steals from you, you don’t say, “That’s their truth.”
If someone abuses a child, you don’t say, “That’s their truth.”
Everyone becomes an absolutist the moment evil shows up.
So the question isn’t whether truth exists. The question is who gets to define it.
The Spiritual Root: The Self Replacing God
Now we’re at the heart of it.
This modern “my truth” movement isn’t neutral. It has a spiritual direction.
It moves authority away from God and into the self.
And that isn’t a new idea. It’s the oldest one in the book.
📜 Genesis 3:5
“For God knows that in the day you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”
That temptation wasn’t just about knowledge. It was about who gets to define reality.
“Be like God.”
Decide for yourself.
Define good and evil.
Become your own authority.
Now look at how modern language repackages the same impulse:
“Follow your heart.”
“Be true to yourself.”
“Create your own meaning.”
“Live your truth.”
Same root. Different vocabulary.
And it always leads to the same place: the self on the throne.
God’s Word Doesn’t Fit Inside “My Truth” Culture
Here’s where the collision happens.
If God is God, then truth is not negotiable. If Scripture is God’s Word, then it doesn’t become true when it resonates with us. It is true because God is true.
The Bible doesn’t treat truth like a personal possession. It treats truth like a reality we must submit to.
📜 John 14:6
“Jesus said to him, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.’”
Jesus didn’t present truth as one option among many. He spoke as the Truth. Not a truth. The Truth.
That means truth is not something we customize. It’s Someone we follow.
📜 John 17:17
“Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth.”
This line matters because it tells us how God changes people. He sanctifies them by truth.
Not by affirmation.
Not by self-definition.
Not by inner resonance.
By truth.
And truth doesn’t just comfort. It corrects. It exposes. It cleans. It leads.
If we remove truth from the center, we don’t become more loving. We become more lost.
The Bible Warns What Happens When Truth Gets Flipped
Scripture doesn’t just tell us what truth is. It shows us what happens when people start redefining it.
📜 Isaiah 5:20
“Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!”
This is what relativism produces over time. Not peace. Inversion.
And it doesn’t happen overnight. It happens slowly, through language. Through “everyone has their truth.” Through “don’t judge.” Through “that’s just your interpretation.”
Until eventually, evil is protected and holiness is treated like harm.
📜 Judges 21:25
“In those days there was no king in Israel; everyone did what was right in his own eyes.”
That line is not a celebration. It’s a diagnosis of collapse.
When everyone does what’s right in their own eyes, truth becomes preference and power.
📜 Proverbs 14:12
“There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death.”
That verse doesn’t say, “There is a way that is wrong and feels wrong.”
It says it seems right.
That’s the danger. Something can feel righteous and still lead to death.
The Human Heart Isn’t the Standard
This is where modern culture will fight back.
“But I feel it.”
“But I know it.”
“But it’s real to me.”
Again, feelings are real. But they’re not the final authority.
📜 Jeremiah 17:9
“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; who can know it?”
That’s not a verse meant to crush you. It’s meant to humble you. It’s meant to remind you that the heart is not a clean compass by default. It needs renewal.
That’s why Scripture talks about repentance, transformation, and renewal of the mind.
Because if the heart was automatically trustworthy, we wouldn’t need saving. We’d just need self-expression.
Truth Is Loving, Even When It Hurts
Now let’s be honest.
A lot of people cling to “my truth” because they’ve been hurt by people who used “truth” as a weapon.
They were judged harshly. Shamed. Dismissed. Controlled.
That’s real. And it’s wrong.
But the solution to truth being abused is not to abandon truth. It’s to return to truth as God defines it, and to speak it the way God commands: with grace, patience, and love.
Truth without love is cruelty.
Love without truth is deception.
Jesus Christ is full of both.
And following Him means we don’t sacrifice one to protect the other.
Final Thought
There is no such thing as “your truth” if we’re talking about truth.
There is your perspective.
Your experience.
Your interpretation.
Your feelings.
Those matter. They deserve compassion and patience.
But truth is what’s real. And reality doesn’t bend to us.
When we decide we get to define truth, we don’t become enlightened. We become our own authority. And that is always a spiritual problem, because it places the self where only God belongs.
God’s Word is truth. Jesus Christ is truth. And if we want life, freedom, healing, and clarity, we don’t need to create truth.
We need to submit to it.
Ask Yourself:
Where have I used “my truth” language to protect myself from correction?
Do I treat my feelings as signals to explore, or as verdicts to obey?
Am I asking God to shape my perspective, or am I trying to shape truth around my perspective?
Join the Discussion:
What’s a real-life moment you’ve seen where “my truth” created confusion or damage, and how should Christians respond in a way that’s both clear and compassionate?
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